Graduate Sunday

Good morning! I am so grateful to have been asked to speak on behalf of the All Saints graduates today. I know we have worked hard to accomplish our many different goals and are poised to sail as swiftly as arrows into the world in many different directions. 

My name is Sadie Hilton 

I’m a senior at Russellville high school and I will be officially graduating in 2 weeks. After graduation, I plan to attend the University of Arkansas in Fayetteville next fall.

I’ve often (especially recently) encountered the feeling of pressure to finish that sentence with what my major will be or what my plans are for the future. But the truth is that I have no idea. path on the other hand changes weekly. My most recent serious idea was to be an educator like the 5 generations of teachers before me- but then I spent 8 hours in a first grade classroom and realized after one kid threw up, 3 cried for no apparent reason, and all 21 whined relentlessly over a math worksheet that it takes a very special person for that job. Then last week I met a future pilot and decided flying planes might be fun until I remembered that pilots probably shouldn’t have a crippling fear of extremely high altitudes… meaning that lifestyle isn’t it for me either. As fun as it is to joke about my lack of a plan, it is a constant source of anxiety in my life. I’ve always felt the need to have things figured out, but it only gets more and more real each passing day until graduation. I turned 18 yesterday and it felt so bittersweet to leave childhood behind and enter adulthood. Exciting, but also stressful. It caused me to reflect on everything I’ve learned about myself and about others in these past 18 years. Each new year held something different, and oftentimes difficult. But each year was also beautiful - full of change and growth.

I have always loved the idea of new year’s resolutions. Ephesians 4:22-24 says “To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt by deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.” The new year is always a symbol to me of being washed clean by the love of Jesus. Not only can He change us spiritually so long as we ask, it’s also just so simply refreshing to make a list of all the things you want to improve on and pick some to really focus on for a whole year. For people who can actually stick to them I think it could be life changing- but I am not people. 3 years ago I tried giving up sodas for the new year, but 2 weeks in I passed sonic on my way to school and couldn’t resist. However, something I’ve found to be more beneficial to me is combining what I feel like God wants for my life in the coming year into one word. Usually, my word comes with ease- prayer and a sign from God. But this year was more difficult. I hyper-fixated on making a decision and trying to figure out for myself what word I should live by in 2023. It didn’t feel real that the .23 at the end of my email signifying my graduation year was here, and it felt like I was entering possibly my most important year so far. I felt like my word had to be a great one. One with so much meaning and significance for such an important time in my life. I spent countless hours praying and waiting for God to give me something to live by, but nothing ever felt right. I was so focused on finding the PERFECT word and convinced that if I did, it would be a PERFECT year. I was and still am so uncertain about what I will do in my life that it was tempting to find something I could control and use to take power over this year and my future. It’s so tempting to just want to know. But that is human nature, not God’s. Romans 12:2 says “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” By February 1st, when I still hadn’t come up with the perfect word, I started to worry that I had wasted a whole month praying for the wrong thing. So this time, instead of asking God for a word to live by, I asked for His will to be done. I decided that as much as I couldn’t control what would happen in the year to come, I couldn’t force a word that was supposed to be given to me by God. So I let Him take the wheel and patiently prayed for Him to allow me to believe wholeheartedly that His plan for me is good, even if I couldn’t see it yet. I surrendered my word over to Christ and Christ alone and he blessed me in return. There is something so special about the word Surrender. I believe it’s something that can be done over and over again, the same way that God heals our spirit over and over. I first surrendered my life to the Lord when I was baptized as a baby. Since then, my parents, Mike and Julieanne have guided me back to Jesus all throughout my life when I have strayed and encouraged me in my faith every step of the way when my path was straight. My dad has taken time out of countless afternoons following a long day of work to speak the word of God over my life at the kitchen table and sacrificed his sleep to share with me what he’s reading in the Bible late into the night. He leads our family with devoted trust in the Lord. My mom is the kindest person you will meet. I remember being a child and following her around while she helped anyone who needed it. and even now, she serves the Lord in the most humble of ways and has raised me to value kindness first and always exemplifies what it means to have a servant's heart. And especially those of you who know my nana, Maryellen Patton know that she is the queen of sacrifice. She leads a life full of example as to what it looks like to surrender to God. She is beyond compassionate and never fails to set her own needs aside to tend to the needs of others or do the things that God calls her to do. I am fortunate enough to have been raised by a community of people who love the Lord with all their hearts, and who have guided me to do the same everyday. I thank these people and so many others with my whole heart. 

God calls us to surrender our lives to Him, but I am still learning what it looks like to do this every single day. When I let go of my will to have control, I realized that He had a better word in mind for my year than anything I could have come up with. My stress and anxiety over my future and what is to come after I graduate high school is led solely by a lack of trust that God has me. And I’m going to be honest, I still struggle to surrender everything over to Him. I still have anxiety over the future and fear things that are to come. But that’s why God gifted me this word. Not as a goal to achieve or a task I can cross off a list. But a word to remind me who God is through this year full of uncertainty. He promised that He would show Himself to me through it every day if I can only surrender to Him. He placed it as a constant thought in my head, and the word on my lips when all I can do is pray for Jesus to take something from my hands and into His perfect ones.

I see signs of surrender in so many of you, and I know the Lord is using this church as a vessel into the lives of all people. Thank you, All Saints for supporting me in my faith and I feel eternally blessed to be a part of this community. 

Thank you.

Sadie Hilton